I was a first generation college student. I was an angry first generation college student. I didn’t know why I was angry all the time. That’s when I started to drink and smoke more.
My mom had no idea how to support me in college. When I told her I was going back to school to get my Masters, she had no idea why or in what program. My mom agreed to pay my undergraduate student loans and I would pay my graduate student loans. That never happened. I pay both loans and continue to have no life.
Of course, I graduated from college and walked across the stage to get my diploma. I remember that day like it was yesterday. It was early May. The day was cold with periods of rain and we had the ceremony outside, on the grass, in the mud. I was freezing and so was everyone else. I spent a lot of time inside “using” the restroom a little too much.
I graduated with a BA in Political Science from Cabrini College. My mom wanted me to go to law school to become a lawyer. That was not my dream; it was her’s. I ended up getting a job at Radisson Hotel in the King of Prussia area as a Sales Coordinator. I hated the job. I wanted a change in my life, but had no idea where to start. All I knew was that I wanted to be happy in my career. I was miserable at this job. I also knew I wanted to change lives and help others, but how?
I looked into my past and thought of all the times my friends would come to me for advice; of all the times I helped my residents as an Resident Assistant; how I want to make a difference in someone’s world who’s being bullied or living with a drug addict for a parent. I loved planning events and activities for college students, so I figured I’d apply to West Chester University of Pennsylvania for the graduate program of Master of Science in Counseling with a concentration in Higher Education/Student Affairs. I figured after graduation I would obtain a job at a college working in various student affairs offices.
It wasn’t until second year of graduate school that I really considered becoming a counselor. However, I didn’t know what type of counselor I wanted to become. It is clear now I want to help others, especially women, find their beauty inside and out. I want to help others who are just like me; depressed, suicidal, anxiety ridden.
Yes, I have a MS in counseling. No I’m not going to brag about it. I didn’t even walk across the stage to receive it. Instead, my friend, Katie, and I went batshit crazy in the town of West Chester borough for the night. I had too much fun and I’m glad I got to spend it with my best friend. Katie, I love you and I miss you. Thank you for always being there for me.
As always, kisses on the peace sign fingers and love…