Changes scare me. I got anxiety when changes occur, but this change is greatly needed. With the changes of Adventures of a Single Jenn, darkness comes light, negativity comes positivity, sadness becomes happiness and a life; not worth living becomes a life worth living.
I was deep in depression when I started this blog. When you have depression, it’s like you have a black cloud hanging over your hand. Combine that with suicidal ideation, it’s as if you are living in your own personal hell. There is no future. You are taking it one day at a time. You’re constantly wondering when it will be over. How much more can you take before you break and you hit rock bottom for the 17th million time?
Then one day, it gets easier; easier to get out of bed, easier to talk to people, easier to socialize with others, easier to do everything. The weight of the world seems lighter, things are going your way, and you’re wondering what happen? You seem happier. You seem more positive. People start noticing. People are coming into your life to stay and not just to ruffle your feathers and leave abruptly one day. People you used to talk to are popping out of the woodwork.
You wonder if you are still useful. You are meant to help clients with depression and suicidal ideation. However, you are in a much better place in life. You are happy. You are positive. Guess what? You have been there. You still have your days. You are just taking in one day at a time. You still have the disease, but you manage to live with it better than others. You can still help those who cannot help themselves.
What’s your purpose in life?
As always, kisses on the peace sign fingers and love…