I’m lying here in bed thinking about what happened today. This past weekend I was asked out twice.
On Friday, my sister ordered food when the delivery driver asked for my number. My sister was way too excited to showcase my availability to this guy. None the less she had way too much fun to see me uncomfortable.
So I was inspired to write a post about dating when that’s not in your plan. However, God threw a wrench in your plan? That’s ok.
The reason I’m single is because I want to be. I’m really focusing on myself and my career. I want to be starting the Licensed Professional Counselor process by June 2018. I want to be a LPC by December 2018. To me dating is seriously not in my mind. However, when God intervenes you never know what can happen! So what can you do when dating isn’t in your plan…
- Gracelessly accept. It’s only one date and hell, you’ll get a free meal out of it.
- Use this to your advantage. You’ll get to know who he is while learning about what you are looking for in a guy.
- You are in control. You can accept a second date or not. Be honest with him about your feelings and what you want.
- If it’s an active date, like going on a hike or a music festival, invite your friends. If you want, ask him first. I’m very much someone who believes in ‘the more the merrier’. I’m very social and love being around people. If your friends come, they can get a sense if this guy is good for you or not.
- Last by not least, be aware of your deal breakers and what you will accept day after day from him if you chose to continue seeing him. I learned this from my friend who’s married. After my last breakup, she gave me a piece of advice I’ll never forget! This advice: When you start dating someone and become exclusive, sometimes it’ll lead to marriage or not. If it leads to the former you have to continue choosing that person day after day. Even with their quirks, hobbies, dreams, behaviors, etc… Can you accept that person’s quirks, hobbies, dreams, FRIENDS and FAMILY day after day in your relationship? Think long about this because half of the time I’ll immediately say ‘yes’, but regret that later.
Being single isn’t bad. You are working on yourself, so when God does put that guy in front of you, you can make an informed decision on whether you want to pursue it or not. Be the best version of yourself and everything will fall in line afterwards…
Peace and Love—> Jenn